He who fights with monsters should be careful lest he gaze long into the abyss... only to find his own reflection.

Confessions of a Cutter (Self-Harm)

(This is a really raw post, showing what goes on in my mind when a razor is near.)

Yeah, I've been drinking-- Yeah, I've been drinking, and I want to cut-- It's too late, I've already thought of it. I will do it.

But something is different this time. I am afraid. I am afraid of you. I am afraid of people, of everybody. And I hate that.

Is that related? I don't know. But I want to cut and see blood flow.

Fear of people, blood will flow. Fear of family, blood will flow. Don't fuck with me, blood will flow. Do you think you know pain? Blood will flow!

Writing Down the Pain
I'd like just once to fall asleep feeling good about myself. Just once. Drunken stupors do not count.